Of mulling, gratitude and a cupcake.

Like someone once said,

If you resist reading what you disagree with, how will you ever acquire deeper insights into what you believe? The things most worth reading are precisely those that challenge our convictions.

Ditto for people. Whether it seems obviously true or not, it is not the obvious cakewalk surely.

As individuals, we always seem to have a construct or are probably busy building one in our little heads that we assume is the universe. It maybe. Or may not. That’s beside the point. But how often do we really listen and understand what others say? And then what fraction of us understand ourselves better after reading something against our belief? How many times is our faith in something restored, reinforced, made stronger by the opponent’s fallacies? And how often are we willing to bend our little rules and think beyond the seemingly superficial?

That makes me wonder about blogs. And people behind it.

I wonder if person A who reads person B’s blog before meeting her would understand B better and be more empathetic than if A had met B at a social gathering? Would A understand B’s point of view better through a blog than in-person? B may not be candid or share innermost thoughts at a party but there will be little behaviours that may put A off. However, B expressing those very behaviours in a blog prompt A to give a hug and say that it is perfectly fine!

I understand that blogs are meant to be an honest expression. So, we will only consider that the blog is an honest expression in our case. If a person expresses herself/himself and reasons out in a blog, I tend to see people being extremely supportive and sharing hugs. Sometimes, I do wonder if they would be so understanding if they hadn’t really listened or read such a candid expression beforehand.

Anyway. The moral being, surprise surprise, I strongly believe that listening seems to be the key again. Blogs seem to make us undertsand so many points of view that we can choose to grow as a person. And the ability to understand a point of view, not being judgemental, being open and basically just being there truly.

Blogs teach us to listen. And I cannot ennumerate the beauty that is a blog.

It has been a year since I started writing here. I have met beautiful people, read some of the most inspiring words, seen some of the most hilarious pictures, learnt a handful of wacky slangs, noted down the book names furiously after tempting reviews, ticked movies off my list, made prints of amazing pictures, learnt a bit of technology, learnt about amazing selfless work happening around, wept after reading heartwarming stories, ogled at someone’s tent and a trek in a distant land, dreamt of meeting the people behind the blogs, bookmarked and emailed links to read later, gaped at simple ingredients being transformed into can-it-be-possible dishes, looked forward to clicking away because I want to eagerly share it here, been enamoured with the layouts of some blogs, got spooked by some horror, polished a bit of my current affairs…. I can go on and on.

But somewhere above all of this, I have rediscovered the joy of listening to a stranger. To someone with a fresh perspective. To widen my own. And for that, to each and every one of you, I shall always be grateful.

Now, let me go eat that cupcake and celebrate my joy! You better hurry if you want some πŸ™‚

Thank you. You all make life so colourful and hence beautiful. Stay inspired!


  1. Visha · March 5, 2013

    wacky slangs…where did you learn that πŸ™„ πŸ™„
    In real world, seeing is believing, in the virtual one, reading is πŸ˜‰ πŸ™‚
    Its magical how a stranger’s thoughts and actions make you rethink about your ideals and beliefs πŸ™‚

    Cupcake wow πŸ˜€

    • kismitoffeebar · March 5, 2013

      He he I read comic strips and stuff – slangs from there sometimes even stories!
      Yeah. Amazes me how reading someone and understanding their logic makes us respond so ! Here’s to blogs!

  2. greenboochi · March 5, 2013

    Agree with every word you have written here Kismi πŸ™‚ Reading a stranger’s point of view does bring a new perspective.. makes me believe strongly in my idelogies and open space for accepting some new ones too.

    I am running after you… cupcake please!! πŸ˜€

    • kismitoffeebar · March 5, 2013

      Thank you GB ! πŸ™‚ Whattay good feeling to see you here again. I read your post – detailed email coming πŸ˜›

      • greenboochi · March 5, 2013

        **jumping with joy** πŸ˜€

  3. kismitoffeebar · March 5, 2013
  4. Atrocious Scribblings · March 5, 2013

    Cheers to your one year of blogging and many more to follow.

    • kismitoffeebar · March 5, 2013

      AS !!!!!!!!!

      So good to see you! πŸ™‚ Thanks so much πŸ™‚ All well?

  5. Amit · March 5, 2013

    I don’t know why but I fear meeting bloggers in real life. πŸ™‚ I have this image in my mind and I would like to keep it as it is.
    Jokes apart, I think it is an amazing experience to meet a blogger in real life. I haven’t done it yet though.

    • kismitoffeebar · March 5, 2013

      I am yet to meet a blogger in real life as well but I am looking forward to it πŸ˜›

    • Swaram · March 5, 2013

      Thankfully, very very very few of them have broken that image for me πŸ˜› πŸ˜›

  6. Destination Infinity · March 5, 2013

    Why should blogs always reflect the real picture of the person behind it? In the real world, people put forward only their best appearances (while in public, at least). Similarly, bloggers might put forward only their best words and best experiences, on their blogs. I write an autobiography, but how many times have I put up embarrassing situations that have happened in my life, there? For humor, yes. But otherwise, not much.

    But then, I do agree that bloggers are frank and open to discussions/debates, which most people in the real-world aren’t. Bloggers (including me sometimes) are guilty of thrusting their beliefs and thoughts, on others. It takes a lot of time to evolve, to mature as a blogger. But I am happy that readers are patient enough. At least in my case, they were.

    Destination Infinity

    • kismitoffeebar · March 5, 2013

      Agreed. Once long time back, I had shared an article on your lines. But putting their best appearances is not false. It is still the best you ! And is not really false, right?

      Hmm, thrusting beliefs – I don’t know. Still upto the reader to take it in, right?

      But yes, I agree that blogging is a journey and a very fruitful one at that! πŸ™‚

  7. metherebel · March 5, 2013

    You are right about blogs/bloggers giving us a new perspective of things! Reading blogs enrich us in more ways than one. I guess it would be fun to meet bloggers in real.

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      Hey metherebel!

      Welcome here πŸ™‚ I am sure it would be great fun ! πŸ™‚

  8. Titaxy · March 5, 2013

    πŸ™‚ Wish you a very happy blog anniversary! And here’s to many many more years of writing and reading. To blogging.

  9. KP · March 5, 2013

    Do you need all this preamble to eat your cupcake? Lols
    My view is that we go purely by the content in the post and not whether the blogger is honest with his/her opinions.If the content or the style of writing appeals to me,I continue to follow.How they look like,tall or short,good looking or plain,high or low in position,young or old are all not relevant.To some extent distance or anonymity lends enchantment.If bloggers meet,they either like or dislike instantly and the blogs too suffer the same fate.
    Nice read.Thanks

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      he he – trust you to say that KP πŸ™‚ Definitely, the physical attributes are not important. Anonymity lends enchantment – exactly why I don’t name myself here πŸ˜›

  10. Swaram · March 5, 2013

    Happy 1 kismi πŸ™‚ And yayy to this wonderful world of blogging πŸ™‚

  11. Jas · March 5, 2013

    A very happy anniversary and I am glad to have met you… but I have said that already πŸ™‚ I think that is the beauty of virtual world … honest expressions – some shielded some not so but helping us evolve in different ways.
    and now the most important thing – the cupcake… I want one…. now πŸ™‚

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      he he thanks Jas ! I am so glad to have met you as well πŸ™‚ Cup-cake anytime! I told you, all you need ot do is come here!

  12. suthewriter · March 6, 2013

    Couldn’t agree with you more. But yes, I do notice that people tend to agree with each other a lot on blogs. On the flip side, I have noticed a few times that disagreements in opinions aren’t all that welcome. Very few times. Or maybe it’s just the way you choose to articulate your disagreement.

    Yes, when we meet a person in real life, our judgments based on appearance and other mannerisms take precedence. I was watching a show yesterday where this guy was wondering about his childhood friend, “I wonder if we had met today, would we still become friends?” Translated to the blog world, it would be, “If we had met in person first, would we still have become friends?”

  13. Roshni · March 6, 2013

    congratulations on one year!! Here’s to more of the joy of listening to a stranger bring in a fresh new perspective!

  14. The Girl Next Door · March 6, 2013

    A very happy blogiversary, Kismi! πŸ™‚
    I can relate to everything you say here about blogs and the people behind them… I have had the opportunity to meet a couple of bloggers. Only once has it been a disaster. The other times, it has been total fun. πŸ™‚

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      Wow ! That must have been good. I am yet to experience that πŸ™‚
      Thanks TGND ! πŸ™‚

  15. The British Asian Blog · March 6, 2013

    I sometimes wonder – how people interacted with one another (stranger to another stranger) before platforms such as this were around. I mean the world, then, would have been a massive place – whereas now, it is a much smaller place with ample opportunity to learn from total strangers. I can so relate to this post.

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      Absolutely BA ! Totally loving the learning here πŸ™‚

  16. pixie · March 7, 2013

    cupcakes!! yummm!
    Congratulations on completing a year!
    Blogging is beautiful! and I have met a few people whom I read after meeting them! heh!
    and yes, so many of my views have changed for the better, so many people are inspiring and their stories always bring a smile on my face!

    Keep writing dear and stay inspired! πŸ™‚

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      Thanks dear Pixie! πŸ™‚ Woohho, that’s a reverse switch – also vry exciting! πŸ™‚ Hugs right back in abundance πŸ™‚

  17. Filter Kaapi · March 7, 2013

    Hmm yeah in person, there are more chances of being judged before being understood.
    In blogs there is space, time and words to express your point of view πŸ™‚

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      See? You wrote the entire post in one line ! πŸ™‚

      • Filter Kaapi · March 8, 2013

        Ah.. No!! The muffin is the best part and I missed that πŸ˜‰ BTW congratulations on completing 1 year of blogging!

  18. girlinjammies · March 7, 2013

    Happy Blog Anniversary Kismi ! Here is to many more years of kismitoffeebar.

    Many a time I wonder how people met other interesting people before all these social media platforms came about ! Sigh ! πŸ™‚

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      Thankee girlinjammies! πŸ™‚ Ah yes, that seems like ages back πŸ˜›

  19. vishalbheeroo · March 7, 2013

    Insightful post. Blogging teaches us to listen even if we have the habit of cutting someone’s converso short.

    • kismitoffeebar · March 8, 2013

      Hi Vishal ! πŸ™‚

      Welcome here ! Thank you. You are absolutely right there! πŸ™‚

  20. My Era · March 11, 2013

    A very Happy Anniversary Toffee πŸ˜€

    I think we in real life we fail to concentrate owing to our pre-occupied minds that keep us from hearing the full story or noting the signs that need careful observation. Whereas in blogs to know the full story you have no choice but to concentrate and read it yourself. That makes a whole lot of difference.

    Heres wishing for many many years of successful publishing for you πŸ™‚
    Hugs Toffee!!

    • kismitoffeebar · March 12, 2013

      Yeah, you have a point there ME ! πŸ™‚

      Thank you so much. Hugs ! πŸ™‚

  21. chattywren · March 12, 2013

    Lovely post, agree to all you say and here’s what you did not say – add to the colours and the cacophony and inspiration by sharing bits and pieces from your life. Congratulations on finishing one year! btw, it’s been a while since you posted:)

    • kismitoffeebar · March 13, 2013

      Thanks so much Chattywren πŸ™‚ Yes, it has been a while. Been a bit unwell. Soon I shall post πŸ™‚

  22. Terese Carolan · March 15, 2013

    I just want to tell you that I’m new to blogs and actually loved this web page. Very likely I’m going to bookmark your blog post . You amazingly come with awesome posts. Bless you for sharing your website.

  23. Trippin' On Life · March 19, 2013

    very interesting topic that u have strolled on! πŸ™‚
    Its interesting to learn perspectives of different people, like the quote at the top itself says! that is why always love reading comments on any writing! πŸ™‚
    well written! I am finding you after an year since ur first blog, I guess! better late than never!

    • kismitoffeebar · March 20, 2013

      πŸ™‚ You are right! Reading comments is very interesting and sometimes life-changin’!

  24. Pingback: To a glorious 2014! | Kismitoffeebar
  25. Monkey Mind · January 8, 2014

    I know such an old post and I am being a granny coming and commenting only now :P. Sowwieee :/

    Have I told you this before kismi? That you express yourself so wonderfully. With clarity and a finesse that is so unique :). I love reading your blog for that very same reason Kismi πŸ™‚

    “But somewhere above all of this, I have rediscovered the joy of listening to a stranger. To someone with a fresh perspective. To widen my own. And for that, to each and every one of you, I shall always be grateful.” – I nodded my head so much to this that I am rubbing volini there now πŸ˜›

    • kismitoffeebar · January 8, 2014

      Hi MM!

      Oh my God! I feel so wonderful reading your words. Thank you πŸ™‚ I feel very grateful to have friends who understand the thoughts behind my words. Thank you MM πŸ™‚

      So happy to see you here! πŸ™‚

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